Moving Through Emotions
Jennifer Roe • May 13, 2020
How many of us have found ourselves in a place where we are ruminating on something that we have let go? Something that no longer serves us, something that actually was toxic to our being but, once we actually made the change and had to grieve the loss of the life we once lived, we went into a state of overwhelm or a state of depleted emotion? How many of us have been in a place where we became tired of feeling this way but struggled with finding a way to move and release what needed to be released?
Emotions can be such a difficult thing to process through especially when we are in a challenging phase of our lives. This could be when we are at the precipice of change, in the thick of it, or in the final stage of coming out of it. Emotion is how we put our energy in motion, e-motion. Our energy flows where our focus goes, correct? Therefore, when we are processing things like sadness or loss and we allow ourselves to really feel it, we can get immersed.
Part of feeling sadness and loss, especially when going through emotional change is that they are very inward emotions. You are grieving a life you once had, and this can bring up feelings about you, feelings around what you perceive as loss or memories around what you have moved forward from; traumas or triggers, comparisons, nostalgia, judgements, regrets, bitterness, questions, and if we are not careful, we can drown in it. It is like the memories of what was lost or the idea or concept of what could have been, can all come rushing in and be very overwhelming, even when the change you have made is the best damn decision of your life!
That inwardness is such a powerful way to feel what you need to feel so you can move through it. If we don’t experience what we need to experience, if we don’t grieve what we need to grieve, if we don’t allow ourselves to feel what we need to feel than how do we ever move to the next phase of where we need to be? It is part of the process.
Anger is a different type of emotion we can experience when we are going through an emotional change, it has more of an outward energy. Anger is an energy of action and if used in the right way, in a purposeful way that doesn’t harm ourselves or others but rather helps us to open up a floodgate, to move that inwardness to outwardness, it can help to move stuck emotion.
Anger can be a misinterpreted energy as we often think about it in terms of violence, as an uncontrolled behavior that can lead to bad results. However, if used in a healthy and appropriate way, it can help to move some s***! If the thought of feeling angry doesn’t sit with you then maybe reframe it. Think of it as an energy of action. Maybe for you it is about writing out everything and burning it (in a fireproof container of course), or some type of physical movement that allows you to let it go.
Have you ever tried screaming into something like a blanket or a pillow when you are feeling sad and are unable to cry? Well, I can say that I did this not too long ago and wow. That emotion I had been holding allowed the flood gate to open when it shifted into an outward action! Maybe it is a matter of focusing on the trigger of your sadness and allowing yourself to get angry about it, maybe it is a matter of getting to the nitty gritty of why you are feeling the way you are feeling, maybe it is about thinking about all of the bulls*** you have been going through for just a moment and letting it all out!! Remember, there is always a catalyst for change and there is always an internal motivation to make things better. You are simply in a phase, you are riding out the storm, you are walking through the fire to get to the light.
It may feel counterintuitive to give yourself permission to feel this fluctuation of emotion. I recognize that a lot of us want to see ourselves as being in control, as being in touch with our feminine, as being peaceful beings and please do realize that ultimately that is who you are!! However, going through change can feel a bit like being on a roller coaster and maybe just maybe we need to tap into another part of ourselves in order to achieve the state we are searching for. The balance that allows us to be aligned, at peace, and to feel whole again.
We all have a dualistic nature and in order to find the balance we strive to achieve we may need to pull from both sides. We have yin and we have yang; we carry masculine and we carry feminine; we need to go inward and we need to go outward. Some of us lean much more in one direction and so it can be more challenging or uncomfortable to go to the other side but realize you are more powerful than you think. Give yourself permission to feel what you need to feel in order to move what you need to move.
We are ultimately the creator of our lives and with that we can determine what action we need to take in order to balance ourselves; we can determine what we need to tap into in order to transform, and with that, how to release what we need to release. Remember, there are phases of transformation, and realize that you will get through this. Now let’s start focusing on celebrating the next chapter of your life!!
Love. We almost always associate love with giving our hearts and our good intentions to someone we care for. However, when that energy is directed inward and we allow ourselves to experience what feels good for us, we are filling our own buckets. It is a true act of self-love. When I think of words that define ways to love ourselves more, pleasure is one that we tend to ignore. The word pleasure is defined as a feeling of happy satisfaction and enjoyment. Pleasure is something that we can find by having awareness around the little things that please us. When we know what makes us feel that happy satisfaction and enjoyment and make a point of purposefully seeking it, we can bring more contentment and joy into our lives. Our senses are extremely powerful and directly connected to these feelings of pleasure. When our senses are engaged in a healthy and positive way, our brains literally release happiness hormones like serotonin and dopamine; love chemicals like oxytocin; and all sorts of feel goods that enhance our mood! The olfactory sense is a powerful one so feed it! Are there natural or familiar fragrances that you enjoy? Diffusing or simply inhaling essential oils is a wonderful way to elevate your mood. When you smell something that pleases you, it goes straight to your brain and amplifies your happy! Another way of saying this is that it raises your Qi. Rose oil and Frankincense are both known for their energy enhancing frequencies! It is amazing how much impact our auditory sense and what we listen to actually has on us. Music is one potent way to connect to your ultimate contentment in the moment. You can choose certain sounds, or types of music that make you feel joyful, playful, more energized, sensual, or even peaceful. There is a reason that sound healing is such a powerful healing modality. There could be tones or affirmations that bring you to an elevated state. Tuning forks not only can increase energy flow but can help energetic blocks to clear, the sound they omit is extremely healing. Play with it all and love it! What we see in our surroundings is a huge contributor to our personal pleasure. Are there particular colors that make you smile? Colors can help to amplify mood. Wearing colors that match how you are feeling or would like to feel is a beautiful way to set intention for your day. Are there outfits that when you put them on, you like how you look? Then wear them! Decorate your home in a way that is visually appealing, in a way that brings a sense of gratification. . Remember, less clutter equals better Qi flow and if you ask me, more Qi flow, more pleasure😊 What pleases your body? Are you allowing yourself to explore and figure out what feels good to you? Are there specific acts of touch, or intimate connection that you enjoy whether that is with your partner or with yourself? When we allow healthy touch into our lives even something as simple as a hug can have an incredibly positive effect on our psyche. What about textures or fabrics that light you up whether it is soft and fuzzy, silky or smooth? If they feel good next to your skin, cuddle up in them! The senses are remarkable in the way that they not only have the ability to stimulate feelings of pleasure in the moment but they also can trigger feelings of satisfaction and contentment that are a remembering, a connection to something we have experienced in our childhood. Pleasing our palate definitely has the ability to tap into this deep-rooted satisfaction. I know that from a health-conscious perspective this can be a slippery slope. I have always been a fan of the 80/20 rule or heck, even the 70/30 rule which means, finding regular ways to incorporate as many delicious and gratifying whole foods into your diet is best. However, really indulging those taste buds every once in a while, and not feeling an ounce of guilt over it, is not only extremely satisfying but is a very pleasurable way to live. What about the energetic realm? Are there people in your life that when you are around them, they lift you up? Are there certain movements or dance that make you smile? Are there acts of self-care that leave you feeling fulfilled, that leave you feeling connected? Do you have intentions or desires or goals that once accomplished, they bring you joy? I challenge each and every one of you to think about what brings you pleasure in every aspect of your life. If you do not like the word pleasure; switch it to joy, switch it to contentment or satisfaction, or don’t. Continue to say the word over and over and over again until you can own it. You deserve it. This is truly an act of self-love and ultimately, we can all use more love in our lives! If you are feeling like things need to shift and it is time to make a change in any and/or all aspects of your life; if you would like to discover what truly does bring you pleasure, joy, and happiness; then reach out. I am offering three-month programs incorporating energy healing, Akashic Record readings, guidance sessions, and more. Please know that this work can be done remotely or face to face. Let’s do this together and get you to where you want to be! Reply to this email and let's get started.
Spring is here! With that comes rejuvenation, motivation, energy, and warmer weather! I don’t know about the rest of you but for me, this winter was a bit rough. I felt very inward, and sickness seemed to be everywhere including my house! I guess I can say that my social agenda was not one to brag about. As always, nature has her cycles and so do we. The snow is melting, the birds are chirping, the buds are showing and there are reminders everywhere that things are blooming. Internally, I am feeling the same way. I almost want to give myself a high five and say, welcome back! Spring is a beautiful time to reset everything and step out of the cave, to step out of the cocoon so many of us go into during the winter. Physically, mentally, and energetically, we are awakening again. I feel motivated to clean out the things in my home that I no longer use or need in order to make more fresh space. Connection with the world, the people in my life who bring me joy and make me smile is calling to me again. I feel the desire to make plans to do things that lift me up; get out into nature more regularly and breathe in that fresh air and sunshine. I crave the resetting of my body, to clear out the gunk and get this party started, literally! With the warmer weather we start craving different foods and an abundance of new foods are in season. Thank goodness. I personally find that after a certain amount of time, I get bored and need to mix it up. It is time for the hearty comfort foods to take a back seat and start pleasing our palates with things that are a bit lighter and fresher. Things like asparagus, avocados (for me, I don’t know if these ever go out of season), broccoli, kale, radishes, strawberries, are all but a few examples. If you enjoy detoxing, and your body does well with it, this is a great time to do so. According to Traditional Chinese Medicine, the spring is the time for rejuvenation and for new growth, it is the time to refresh ourselves and to cleanse the liver. If working with a naturopath or acupuncturist certain herbs, specific foods, or healing modalities may be recommended to support this process. There are so many options when it comes to giving your body a break. If you feel this calling, I encourage you to do your research and figure out what most resonates with you as we are all bio-individual and there is a broad spectrum to choose from. Personally, I have recognized that my body does not enjoy intense or drawn out detoxes. Therefore, I like to keep it simple and eliminate toxins and anything that can be inflammatory like alcohol, caffeine, sugar, anything artificial, processed and heavy meats, dairy, wheat and other flour products. Realize that because of your bio-individuality, you may consider certain foods inflammatory that others do not. Fruits and vegetables in the night shade family is just one example of this. If you love your caffeine, sugar, and white flour, think about systematically reducing your intake to reduce withdrawal symptoms. You can always reach out to a health coach, nutritionist, or an alternative/ holistic practitioner for guidance. I then pick a time frame where I know my schedule is manageable and stick to smaller portions of lean and healthy cuts of meat, fresh fruits and vegetables, teas, broths, and lots of water. I also make sure that I am being gentle with myself; detoxing from not only foods but screens, and intense physical exercise. I do like to get some form of energetic body work to help with the Qi flow and the clearing; take gentle walks in nature, lay in a salt bath (or a couple), meditate, listen to calming music, and just allow myself to be. As I reset my body, my energy, my physical space, me; I feel strong and capable to create what is next with enthusiasm, vibrancy, and vitality! I take care of my whole being. As I clean out the old on a physical, mental and energetic level, I allow for the new to come in and, it feels amazingly refreshing!
Peopling can be hard. I firmly believe one of the most rewarding yet challenging pieces to this adventure called life is learning how to be in healthy relationship with others. Often times, some of our biggest lessons come from navigating these relationships. If we open our eyes and are willing to see the mirror that is put in front of us and develop the ability to recognize what is ours, and what is not; what feels good and works for us versus what feels icky and does not work for us, and honor that; they are huge opportunities for growth and transformation. Learning how to respond versus react when there is a confrontation with another person is something that can be a huge challenge. Figuring out whether or not you are feeling a certain way based on someone else’s reaction or response is an incredibly introspective process. We all carry trauma. We all carry stories or have negative thoughts that we have taken on throughout our lifetime. Often times, the lens we use to see and interpret the rest of the world is rooted in these moldings, these experiences that have shaped who we are today. When we develop relationships with other humans, they also carry their own set of traumas and stories and experiences. Their lens and how they interpret the world is most likely different than ours. I view this navigation almost like a dance, a dance of personal awareness and growth. When confrontation comes to the forefront, it can completely annihilate everything if we are not aware of our triggers, and again, what is ours and what is not. I truly feel the work is the willingness to see what our responsibility is, sit with what the outcome of our response could lead to, and find a way to communicate in a way that is true for us. What is the difference between a reaction vs. a response?A reaction often times can be abrupt it can feel barbed. It is coming from an emotional place, and it can stem from defensiveness, anger, guilt, shame or blame. More often than not we want to deflect, or project, and place the blame on the other person. A response is when we take a moment to really sit with our emotions and determine why we are feeling the way we do. This can be a process and when we are able to separate what is ours, and what is not; figure out why we feel whatever emotion it is that we feel around the situation; be willing to see where our responsibility lies, and then express ourselves; we allow ourselves to respond in a more deliberate and authentic way. What are some ways to help us respond in a way that feels better to us? Practice! This is not easy and automatic. Do not react in a defensive and abrupt way. Be mindful-take a deep breath, step back, and ask whoever it is you are communicating with for some time to process what it is you need to say. Take this time to think about why you are feeling triggered and figure out if it is legitimate. Look at the big picture. Is it all yours or has the other person contributed or acted in a way where communication needs to happen? What are the potential consequences of your response? What do you really feel you need to say and what is the motivation behind it? When we are able to do this, we are stepping into self-awareness and we are raising our vibration. I don’t think anyone truly wants to come from a place of negative intentions as when we put out negative energy, that is what we are calling back in. One of the goals in our personal relationships should be to create a container for one another that is safe and supportive. If we can take a moment to really figure out where we are coming from and how we can say it in a way that doesn’t compromise ourselves but yet expresses to the other person our feelings, boundaries, and what works for us we have the ability to establish a trusting and lasting bond! How far are you willing to go?
The majority of us have something that we would like to change in order to improve the quality of our lives.This could be getting out and connecting more with others. Maybe it is finding our passion or shifting our life course. I understand that change whether big or small can be an intimidating concept however, enjoying life to the best of our ability should be an ultimate goal! If we have this awareness and know that we want something to be different, then what prevents us from doing it? Is it possible to get out of our own way to make a change for the better? Self-sabotage is a real thing. Many of us have become really good at telling ourselves all the reasons we can’t do something rather than telling ourselves all the reasons we can. It is easier than we realize to come up with excuses as to why we can’t do what we ultimately know we need to do. Our minds are often times on overdrive finding ways to talk us out of anything that might go against our comfort zone or that will lead us into new or foreign territory. The excuse of time and busyness are big ones. Everyone in this world is busy. However, busyness should not define us. The reality is, the busier we are the more we need to prioritize time for what relieves stress or what can make life more enjoyable. When we find ourselves making these types of excuses, I would challenge us to question the reason why. Often times, excuses are our way to make ourselves feel better and not have to take personal responsibility for why we aren’t doing something that we feel we should be doing. Excuses are a way to avoid judgement both from ourselves and from others. It is hard to recognize that we are the only ones that have control over what we do. In order to achieve what we want to achieve, in order to be where we want to be, we have to make the conscious decision to make that change as it is only up to us. It is our choice. Some of the barriers that could be preventing us from moving forward could be things like a lack of motivation, distraction, or a feeling of unworthiness. Maybe we have painted ourselves into a corner and we can’t see our way out. Again, our minds are really good at taking over and keeping us stuck. For others of us, it is fear; plain and simple. If we don’t ever do anything, change anything, try something out of our comfort zone, then we never push our limits and this keeps us “safe”. The unknown can be scary but if we don’t face it, how do we ever shift our lives for the better? If you are motivated to start working through the barriers that are preventing you from moving forward, here are some suggestions as to how to start: Write, write, and write some more. What do you want in your life? How do you want to feel? What do you want to achieve? Are you choosing to live in a way that is in alignment to where you want to be? When we put things to paper, it is setting intention which can bring us clarity as to next steps. Remember, we are our own guides and intention is putting energy in motion. Visualize. What does it look like when you are where you want to be? What does it feel like? Imagine it, and feel the feeling as if it has already happened. Practicing this regularly is again resonating with the energetic alignment of where you want to be. It is a powerful form of manifestation. Work on calming the mind. Find a mindfulness routine that will help with learning to listen more to your intuitive side rather than allowing the “monkey mind” to well, spin you out! Be aware of the excuses. It is important to recognize that you are the one who is in control of your life. If you want change it is ultimately up to you. So, rather than making excuses, do something about it. The other side to this is, if you aren’t ready to do something about it then I would encourage you to sit with the reason why; the REAL reason why. There might be a lot more to your resistance than you realize. And, often times when we are able to reach this place of awareness, it leads us to figure out ways to move forward. Play with the resistance, get out of your comfort zone. If something feels uncomfortable then challenge yourself to push pass that. Commit and take action. What can you commit to and what is sustainable? For example, if you are wanting more connection and to meet people, can you commit to finding or joining some type of social activity or group once a week? Once a month? Figure out what works for you and then hold yourself accountable. Remember, we are the creators of our universe and in order to make things happen, we must take action! Come work with me! I can help support you to make the change you need in your life. Sometimes all we need is that little bit of extra guidance, motivation, and clearing of energy! Move the gunk. Bring in clarity, feel aligned, calm your system, and play in the magic. It is truly amazing the possibilities of what can be! It is all possible, it is all doable. We all have the ability to change things for ourselves, we simply need to make the choice and start moving forward.
A concept that I have related to my entire life was recently given a name by a teacher of mine. This is the both/and way of thinking. It is a more open-minded approach to viewing the world. The way we process our experiences, emotions, and the situations we find ourselves in can have a broad range of multiple truths. On the opposite side of this spectrum is the concept of the either/or. This is a more linear or singular way of thinking; meaning that things can go either one way or the other. There is basically one truth. Life is not so black and white… We are complex creatures. We all have the ability to feel and believe in ways that are multi-faceted. When we allow ourselves to shift from the linear way of thinking, we open ourselves up to a spectrum of possibility. Let’s use a life-changing event for an example. When someone is going through a divorce, they could be feeling sadness and grief for what is lost AND at the same time could be experiencing excitement and joy for what’s to come. The roller coaster of emotions could be fear, anger, and panic as well as calmness, happiness, and relief. There is not one right way to feel, it is not one or the other; it can be both. For many of us it is in our nature to think that things are and should be straightforward. We want the clear, concise answer, the simplified end result. And, much of our society tends to operate in this way. It has also gotten to a place of extremes. You have to choose a side. Do you feel this way or that? This is the either/or way of thinking which can have its benefits but it can narrow the possibility of what is. It puts our view of the world into a much more limited and often times, judgmental scope. It is not that simple. Life and people in general, are too multifarious to think this way… Being in relationship with others should never be black and white; and to be clear, a relationship is not defined by just your partner. It can be anyone you are personally connected to. When others are in our lives, at some point, there will be a disagreement or conflict that needs to be worked through and, with that we have choice as to how we move through it. When conflict is managed in the realm of the either/or, someone is right and someone is wrong. There is one truth. When we approach conflict this way, we run the risk of not being able to resolve the matter at hand. It could lead to harboring resentment against the other involved, divisiveness, or the feeling of not being heard or seen. It could even lead to losing that relationship or changing it in a way in which it may never be the same. On the flip side, when conflict is managed in the realm of the both/and, we are able to consider another point of view. We open ourselves up to the idea that there are multiple truths. There is more than one side to any given situation. We are allowed to have differing opinions but at the same time, are open to the other perspective. Can we understand the other person’s viewpoint AND agree to disagree? If we are not willing to consider the broad range of emotional complexities when we are relating to another person, how can a relationship thrive? When we take all sides into consideration, there is more possibility of reaching a common ground. The both/and way of thinking allows us to step outside of the box. It can give us a different perspective on not only how we view others and ourselves but how we process a particular event. Often times, there are multiple shades of gray in any given situation. It helps us to realize that everyone is on their own path, has a right to their own experiences as well as how they process their emotions; regardless of what others are going through. We can feel and be a multitude of ways about anything! Life is not a singular way of being. There is a complexity, a richness to it. When we open ourselves to the potential of this, our perspective of the world and others can grow and evolve. How far are you willing to go?
Appreciating where we are in this moment and what we have in our present life can be a challenging concept. As a society, we seem to be caught up in the idea that our happiness lies in our future self; our happiness lies in a distant, far-off place. Have you ever thought or said the words, “Once I get to this place, ‘fill in the blank’, I will be good?” “I will be happy when…?”, I will be satisfied as soon as…?” What if rather than existing in a place that has not even happened yet, we chose to exist and cherish where we are now? I know, it sounds strange. We are over achievers, we compare ourselves to others, we are always striving for more, we thrive in our distractions. We get caught up in our busyness and our stories but, what happens when we come towards the end of our lives and we look back? Do we want to remember the hours we stressed and worked ourselves into a tizzy? Do we want to remember the distractions of screens and social media and things that aren’t real? Or, do we want to remember our connections with the people we love, the laughter shared? Do we want to remember our real-life experiences that bring us joy; the things we had a passion for; the knowledge we gained, the moments and adventures we lived? As a culture, I believe that many of us are not connected to ourselves. We don’t know what it means or feels like to be embodied. We are often times in such a state of stress, a constant state of busyness and distractedness, we don’t know where to even begin to find that inner peace or what if feels like to be fulfilled within ourselves; to be comfortable in our own skin. True happiness comes from within and is something that is achievable and when we are present, we can learn to appreciate everything around us, that much more. Yes, it requires work, yes it requires conscious action and conscious choices. But, please hear me when I say, it is worth every bit of the time and dedication to get there. I encourage you to take a few deep breaths and think about the questions below and then take the time to sit with your answers. What attributes do you appreciate about yourself right now? What do you love in your life right now? What puts a smile on your face in this present moment? What are your distractions? Do they leave you feeling fulfilled or are they simply a means of escape? Are you currently happy? If not, what is preventing you from feeling this way? What changes can you make to get there? These questions are simply an indicator of where you are currently and to notice what comes up for you. Does your mind rush to answer these questions or are you able to take some deep breaths and really feel into your answers? Presence within ourselves is so very important and it takes practice. When we can take a moment to set aside the distractions, slow down the mind and feel into something through our bodies, we are allowing our intuition to guide us; we are trusting answers to come from a deeper place. Believe me, I am one of the first people to encourage setting goals for yourself, for dreaming big and creating a life beyond your dreams! If you allow yourself to think in terms of, the both and… it is a bit of a paradox. Things in our life aren’t always either or, there are multiple ways to be and at times that can feel like a contradiction but we are complex beings and the way we live our lives is not black and white… If you aren’t present and able to find contentment within yourself; once that dream is achieved, will you truly appreciate it or will it always be about what is next and about attempting to find happiness through something outside of yourself? Finding a way to appreciate where you are in this moment while also allowing yourself to create what you want in your life is a beautiful place to be.
I remember right after I got divorced I would have moments where I was not in the best space. I was going through a lot of BIG changes and there was a particular night when I completely broke down. At that time, I was holding on to a lot of fear. Fear that I wasn’t going to be ok, that my world may just crumble. I was sitting in my bedroom crying, asking Archangel Michael for help, for guidance, to give me a sign that everything was going to be ok. When I walked out of my bedroom there was a blue feather sitting on my living room floor. For those of you who are not familiar with Archangel Michael, his energy is blue. I had two choices at that point; I could be a skeptic, blow it off, and convince myself that SOMEHOW this random blue feather made its way into my living room. OR, I could believe; I could trust, and I could open my heart to the amazing possibility that there is a higher energy that is communicating with me and reassuring me that I am supported and that everything is going to be alright. Since that night, blue feathers have become a sign for me and have appeared on multiple occasions when I am needing to be shown that the universe has my back. It is a beautiful and magical thing. Are you paying attention to the signs that the universe is providing you? Signs can come in many different forms. They can appear as heart shaped rocks, or feathers, or something super profound that shows up right as you are thinking a particular thought; animals that cross your path, synchronicities that happen. Sometimes they can be number sequences, or rainbows, or symbols left by someone who is passed. Personally, I have found that the symbols and signs that appear in my life can literally appear right in a specific moment and it is very clear that I need to take notice of them. Or they can be a little more subtle, like a message that I hear in a different way several times or a specific energy or pattern that continues to show up. Are you paying attention to what the universe is communicating to you? If you are willing to be open and trust that there is more out there than what we can see, feel, hear, touch, and taste; the world can be become a truly magical place!
Pleasure is something that we can find by having awareness around the little things that please us. When we know what makes us feel that happy satisfaction and enjoyment and make a point of purposefully seeking it, we can bring more contentment and joy into our lives.
There is so much conflicting information out there to decipher in regards to the realm of carbohydrates. Let's take a look at the science and see what's right for you!
I don’t know if you all have been feeling the energy lately but astrologically, things have been a bit shaken up. Depending on where you are in your process and what it is that you have been working through, the full moon eclipse and the gradual ending of eclipse season has seemed to bring with it, a bit of a hammer. It has had this way of shaking things loose and forcing us to look at exactly what it is we need to let go to step into our next phase. When energies are unsettled, it can trigger all sorts of things that we need to either look at, sit with, work through, or release. Often times, especially lately, these triggers can have an anxious or fearful energy. The fearful or anxious energy can be the basis for many of the emotions, the reactions, the explosions that can happen when we are feeling unsettled and not grounded in our body. What is fear? According to Google, it is “ an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat.” Fear can be a good thing when it comes from a place of survival or instinct. If we are aware and pay attention it can be something that keeps us alive and allows us to react accordingly depending on the threat being presented to us. It is when we immerse ourselves in the fear and it becomes a part of our being, our mind, our reactions, our lives that it is incredibly detrimental . There are many factors that can contribute to us living our lives in a fearful place. Obviously, we all have our story and our conditioning and many of us are carrying traumas from earlier years that trigger many unwanted emotions within us. It is almost like there needs to be a balance between sitting with and working through what it is that is coming up for us while also making sure it doesn’t take us over and consumer every aspect of our lives. My teacher always taught me that fear is an illusion and that in order to grow and step into who I truly am, I need to get out of my head. She also stated, that if I could let go of all of my fear, I would be healed immediately. At the time, I thought I understood what she meant by this but the farther along I go on my path the more clearly I can see this illusion and how it can be completely debilitating. In our society, fear sells. The media loves to inundate us with worse case scenarios, share only stories that focus on the dark side, that create the ideas, the thoughts, the beliefs that our world is nothing but negative, disastrous, and basically evil. And, if you’re not careful you too will experience any of the gazillion worse case scenarios that are shared. Depending on who we surround ourselves with and what we expose ourselves to, this can be exacerbated. Are we constantly hearing about doomsday? Are we allowing ourselves to dive into the rabbit hole of darkness, death, and destruction? I am pointing this out as when we focus on the negative and on the worst possible outcomes and allow our minds to marinate, spin out, and hone in on things from this perspective then we are allowing ourselves to live in fear. We are allowing ourselves to exist in the illusion. We are allowing ourselves to have this energy attach to us and not only become part of us but to contribute to the doomsday collective. What is magic? It is the manipulation of energy. What are our thoughts and our intentions? They are energy. What happens when we constantly focus on the worst possible outcome? The energy of lack? The energy of the negative? We are creating fear. We are allowing negative thoughts to rule who we are and how we respond to our daily lives thus limiting ourselves from creating what we want to create. When we live in this fear, we inhibit ourselves from doing things that may actually benefit us. We convince ourselves that we can’t do certain things, be a certain way, change our lives, make ourselves happy, be who we really are because if we do any of these things, something bad will happen. When we live in this mindset, we are living in a frequency that can cause lack, unhappiness, anger, anxiety, depression, and complete stagnancy. It contributes to a state of chaos, a state of fight or flight, it can cause our systems to be in stress mode and can eventually lead to all types of dis-ease that can manifest in any and all levels of our being. Take me for example. I have done a lot of work around this, a lot. I am aware when fear, when ego, when the monkey mind and that chaotic energy is creeping in. And still, there are times when I am on this journey and I feel overwhelmed. As with many of you, I am an empath, a sensitive, and I can feel the energy of the collective. I can feel those around me, especially the ones I am close to and if I am not careful, I can take on their energy. A news headline may pop up on my phone and I allow myself to read and engage in what the media is sharing, and then maybe I read a little more and a little more and a little more. Maybe I think about certain aspects of my life where things could get really bad; Then I listen to some friends or some family members who have strong thoughts, strong opinions, about the way of the world; then I go into the grocery store or out to a public event and there is something energetically there that feeds this pattern, and before I know it; I take it on, it has stuck. When this happens, I can literally feel things in my life start to shift. The shifts can be different depending on what the situation and energy is and it can manifest in many different ways… My sleep can be affected. My self-care routine can change and all of a sudden, I am not doing everything I normally do to take care of myself. I can isolate. I am quicker to anger or lose my patience. My creativity diminishes, and the lack mentality can come in. The worst piece can be when all the possible negative outcomes (which do not exist) enter. Take it a step further, as again, our thoughts and our frequency are energy; my business can slow. I feel stressed. My relationships can be affected. My immune system gets compromised. I feel stagnant or stuck. My mood and energy is lackluster. When I recognize that this is happening, it is time to take a deep breath and get back into my body. It is time to take a deep breath and calm my mind. It is time to take a deep breath and connect. For me personally, getting out into nature is an extremely powerful way to not only clear the chaos but feel the connection which allows the fearfulness to slow. Breathing in the Qi, feeling my feet on the earth, listening to the sounds, being in the full immersion brings clarity. Journaling and allowing the thoughts to release as I put them on paper helps to bring a sense of calm. Seeking out energy healing or body work gets things to shift, to move and to clear. Becoming more intentional and mindful of my thoughts and what I am putting out into the world changes the direction of the energy. Diving into my meditation practice and visualizing and focusing on what I want to create rather than what I don’t is literally magic. Performing ceremony around releasing what it is I need to release and again, creating what it is I want to create takes the frequency to an entire new level. Recognizing what is mine and what is not and releasing anything that I have taken on brings my power back. Avoiding the news, social media as well as others whose energy I do not want in my field is protection. I step back into myself and allow myself to breathe. Ultimately, I focus on trusting and completely surrendering to the flow of the universe. The only thing we can control is ourselves. Why waste our time, our energy on perpetuating things that are out of our control? Why create an illusion of something that does not exist? When we surrender to the natural flow and are present with what is, often times things have a way of just working themselves out. The energy shifts from a place of chaos to a place of peace, of calm, of surrender, of love, of flow. I don’t know about you but that is the place I would much rather be. Let’s release the fear. Sending love and light to each and every one of you and as always, I am here.
